Abdullahi Zuru’s Warped Kebbi Scorecard
By
Abdullahi Usman
“After you’ve heard two eyewitness accounts of an accident, it makes you wonder about history”... Dave Barry
One had tried unsuccessfully to resist the urgent temptation of responding to a news item carried on the September 14, 2005 edition of the Daily Sun in which my namesake, Alhaji Abdullahi Idris Zuru, the Senior Special Assistant (SSA) to the Kebbi State Governor on Media and Publicity, made a spirited attempt to brief the media on the administration’s activities. In the end, however, the disguised falsehood contained in that report, coupled with its deliberate lacing with occasional half-truths and outright demagoguery in some instances, left one with no other choice but to go ahead and respond. The main objective, therefore, is to place some of the claims he made in their proper context, with a view to giving my dear Kebbi compatriots the vital missing links that would enable them better appreciate the full picture. I have read my own fair share of bland interviews and media briefings in the past, but none of them came anywhere close to what we were fed with in that unfortunate outing by Zuru. What makes the whole exercise even more unpardonable is the fact that as a practicing journalist prior to his appointment, one would ordinarily expect the SSA to have acquitted himself better in the discharge of his official assignment.
What was originally billed to serve as a veritable avenue for the official unveiling of the much anticipated government’s performance scorecard of its stewardship during the past six years turned out to be a disastrous exercise in what my fellow Kebbi people would rightly regard as ‘bambadanci’, or praise-singing, in which the SSA chose to inundate his bemused audience with the details of the personal attributes of his principal, whose name he specifically mentioned on at least 23 different occasions in that short report of only half a page! One has also monitored a few NTA documentaries on the state, where that pervasive practice appeared to be prevalent amongst virtually all those who spoke on those programmes. Indeed, when something happens for the first time, it is usually thought to be a mere accident or happenstance; when it happens a second time, it is considered a coincidence; but when the same thing occurs a third time or more, it becomes an established trend that cannot simply be ignored. By the time one was through with reading that monotonous piece, one could only wonder whether Zuru would not have been better off limiting himself to his favourite pastime of featuring and distributing gifts to deserving winners on “Iya Ruwa..”, the weekly Kebbi Television (KBTV) Hausa ‘Kacici-Kacici’ or quiz programme, where members of the local self-help social clubs test their individual IQs by competing in the field of general knowledge.
A popular Chinese proverb states that he who
asks a question is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask a
question remains a fool forever. One is, therefore, constrained to request
for a few salient explanations from the SSA regarding some of the
submissions he made during his press briefing. For instance, it would
really be interesting to understand the basis of his bold proclamation
that the present government’s record of achievement within the past 6
years would “account for over 80% of the entire development recorded in
the state in its 14 years of existence”. Pending that important
clarification, however, even if - for the sake of argument - we accept
such claims as the gospel truth, that otherwise amazing feat would merely
be telling us only a part of the story. Moreover, William Blake (1757 -
1827) had logically argued that “a truth that’s told with bad intent
beats all the lies you can invent”. Available Federation Accounts
Allocation Committee statistics show that Kebbi State and its entire local
government councils received a whopping
Conversely, an extensive enquiry from a very
reliable source, occasioned by the lack of readily available credible
revenue data for the period preceding the current democratic dispensation,
revealed that at the best of times, the state received just under
With regards to the reported giant strides recorded in the rehabilitation of existing schools and construction or new ones, one can only say kudos to the state government for this commendable initiative. However, it would still have been more useful if Zuru had bothered to let the world know the number of very senior government officials whose children attend public schools within the state as we speak. In the absence of any further clarification from him regarding the specific objectives of setting up the “ultra modern Sheikh Abdullahi Fodiyo Centre”, which he spoke so glowingly about, I would like to reserve my assessment of that project, for now. One must hasten to add, though, that if that institution had been built somewhere in Abuja, the much dreaded Department of Development Control would have since added it to its long list of demolished buildings, in view of its current unsuitable location, which shows no apparent consideration for either town planning rules or even the school’s future expansion plans. His ludicrously immodest act of including the two Kebbi Hotels in Abuja and Kaduna amongst the array of projects executed (rather than completed) by the current administration was also objectionably fraudulent, especially in view of the advanced stage of these projects at the time they were handed over to this government.
It is worthy of note that the SSA also took
pains to dwell on this administration’s “poverty reduction programme”
through which “over 1,000 buses and 10,000 motorcycles” were procured and
distributed for commercial purposes to different categories of people on
loan. Perhaps, he should have also gone a little bit further to carefully
explain to his audience the precise terms under which such loans,
especially the motorcycles given specifically to the civil servants, were
extended. For instance, a primary school classmate of mine revealed to me
earlier on this year that such motorcycles were supplied to them on loan
at between
Other categories of loanable items Abdullahi Zuru failed to inform his audience about include cooking stoves, sewing machines, mobile telephone handsets, Sallah rams, bags of rice and such other consumables like petrol, which have also been supplied on credit to willing employees at higher than market prices in the past. Thereafter, monthly deductions are usually effected at source and applied towards the repayment of these loans. In apparent utter disregard to the sensible caution by Dr. Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784) that “the only free foods are found in mouse traps”, the average junior civil servants, who erroneously view these loaned items as coming to them virtually free at the point they are taking them, usually scramble to outdo one another by taking as many of them as they could, only to be saddled with debilitating monthly repayment obligations they cannot easily cope with. Indeed, my dear classmate had narrated to me the sad tale of some of his unfortunate colleagues whose monthly deductions far exceed their meager salaries. As a result, they are forced to source for funds elsewhere, which are then added up to their entire month’s wages in order to make up the balance they usually owe at the end of each month. The more ‘fortunate’ ones amongst them fall into the category of those left with a few thousands at the end of the day and only God knows how they and their families survive on that miserable amount for an entire 30-day period. To borrow from William Shakespeare’s satiric comedy, Timon of Athens, the average Kebbi civil servant has indeed seen better days!
Regarding Zuru’s repeated boasts that the ANPP would continue to govern Kebbi State as well as his blunt declaration that the current Chief Executive “holds the key to (the) actualisation of (the) political ambition of any politician in Kebbi State who may want to succeed him”, one has no real reason to argue with him on that. He must, however, endeavour to take into account Niels Bohr’s simple but rational submission that “predictions are hard, especially about the future”. Again, as a Muslim, one is indeed baffled by the SSA’s repetitive attempts at second-guessing an event that only Allah Himself has the ultimate power to determine. There was also another statement made by the otherwise respected media personality that would ordinarily have made any individual choke with laugher but for its resulting implied tragic import. In his bid to outdo himself in his self-appointed task of singing the praise of his benefactor to high heavens, the SSA inadvertently let out a Freudian slip by admitting to the world for the first time that “whoever contested and won elections from the ward to national levels under ANPP in Kebbi State was elected not based on his personal merits but because he is seen to be a disciple of Muhammadu Adamu Aliero, who the people have absolute trust and confidence in”.
This very unfortunate singular statement has in one fell swoop succeeded in painting my dear Kebbi State in the eyes of the entire world as one state where mediocrity is officially promoted over and above personal merit in the selection of the people’s representatives during elections. That may well explain the possible reason why, apart from one Senator and, perhaps, two or three other members of the House of Representatives, the rest are merely making up the numbers as their voices are hardly heard in the course of regular debates on the floor of the National Assembly. The same can also be said of our representatives in the state legislature, whose performance has so far been nothing to write home about. On the other hand, Zuru has, by his bold confession, also succeeded in saving our historians the trouble of having to cast their nets far and wide in their search for the probable factors responsible for the dismal performance of our elected officials whenever they choose to commence the arduous task of documenting the history our current democratic experiment.
Walter Lippman insists that “it requires wisdom to understand wisdom; the music is nothing if the audience is deaf”. One sincerely hopes that Alhaji Abdullahi Zuru would view this response as nothing more than a humble contribution aimed at empowering our dear compatriots with additional information that will enable them to better appreciate the significance of some of the issues he raised in his press briefing. I will, however, not be entirely surprised if he thinks otherwise and will, indeed, be ready to receive my deserved barrage of artillery, should he decide to aim one at me. As Franklin Jones would argue, “honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger”.
Abdullahi Usman (September 21, 2005)
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