Nigeria

Nigeria, How Not To Re-Brand!

Prince Charles Dickson

It’s been long, and when I say long, I mean very, very long. For a writer and journalist I had taken a sabbatical, one that arose from a thankless job that had tied me down. Like they say better late than never. I am back and hopefully like I have often done, one can continue to preach the gospel of a better Nigeria .

I was not only in Nigeria but also in Abuja when the phones of those that, were re-branding Nigeria was de-branded by the real ‘BRANDS’. And it is on that note that I hit off this essay.

I am writing this from Paris, and what more can I say, than you never realize how much you are missing until you have stayed apart and reflected for sometime. Reminds me of the Yoruba adage of the man who tasted two wives, without which he could not tell the one that was sweetest.

In Paris , just like the rest of Europe and the world there is the global recession, a friend calls it the global poverty. However, the system here in Paris has not gone into global recession. It was pretty refreshing to see the common things of life work. A feat which leadership in Africa’s most populous nation, Nigeria has found difficult to achieve.

In my hotel room, there is no Generator noise, like that of my Nigerian abode, the heater works, I mean can’t imagine if there was no electricity to power the heater, “I for freeze”. It was with smiles that I cross the road, knowing the traffic lights worked and nobody disobeyed them like I do in Abuja Nigeria .

Apart from India , I presume, France comes a distance second or third at the rate of the use of motorcycles and bicycles. Yet, the chaos is manageable, our own solution was to ban them with no alternative, send them to the slums and continue the divide and rule, one area for the rich and another for the poor.

I took a walk to a flower shop, and despite the global recession, I still saw the beauty on display, and the Ijebu-Igbo blood in me could not help but calculate 10Euros multiplied by N230 and I said to myself chei! How do I buy a flower for N2300, but I watched as tourists still scrambled for beauty, and fragrance.

By contrast, in my beloved Nigeria we are still involved deeply in showmanship, deceit and lies and our problems still persist. I recall asking a friend in government, from Chikelu to Dora, how much have we spent on these brandings, rebranding and de-brandings, from the Heart of Africa to Bottom of Nigeria.

How does the re-branding change much when we suffer from leadership that has no positive brand itself. How do we re-brand when we do not have a brand to write home about. At the Nnamdi Azikwe Airport we removed wristwatches, belts and shoes, I made a joke to one of the immigration chap that at least we have come a long way; we don’t have to go naked.

Despite the automation in airports worldwide, the last departure point at the Nnamdi Azikwe Airport is a cooking pot, because the Air Conditioners there do not condition any air. Meanwhile I was greeted by idiotic efficiency at the Frankfurt Airport . I only could say to myself when we get here where would they be.

At the Frankfurt Airport there were notices placed to the effect that a pier was being built to be completed in 2012. In Nigeria we are still playing the politics of Arik and Virgin Airline in Lagos on one hand and the Nnamdi Azikwe Airport on the other hand is still not fully completed.

Paris, has its own problem, the taxi man that took me, had to change route several times as a protest was going on, for this I paid more Euros and need I say that was painful. However when weighed appropriately, the question one has asked continually is why can’t Nigeria work, and walk?

The maps work in Paris , In Abuja Nigeria , the last time, it was change of street names, and then the NTDC had tried selling some MAP readers that did not know where Ladoke Akintola Boulevard was simply because that boulevard had alterations.

Everything in Europe now goes at a discount, to encourage consumer activities; banks are dropping their lending rates. The dollar is low compared to many currencies, in Ghana it is almost at par. In Nigeria everything is the opposite, you hold plenty Naira, little dollar to show for.

Banks do not have FOREX, black markets have in excess, our world is upside down, and our system has been on a perpetual recession for too long, looking for redemption. Leadership has only bothered about itself, the masses be damned.

Its 2009 and we are still battling a lack of cooking gas, we are still are loss, deregulation, to be or not to. Oil subsidies disappear into private pockets, and we need ‘Oyinbo auditors’ because we have no auditors, no, because our auditors are too ‘good’.

In other parts leadership is trying to cushion the effect of the recession, in a state in Nigeria , N200M will be spent to buy cars for traditional rulers. In Europe the statistics do not lie too much, high rise in unemployment, our nation has no statistic except that we know that the number of jobless is disproportionately unequal to the jobs available.

Germany says its economy could shrink 6% to 7%, it’s no different in many parts of Europe and the world. Our money and economy managers keep telling us nothing will go wrong, when we are staring austerity times in the face.

We need to look beyond our shoulders, its bleak, very bleak, the picture ahead of us as a nation is bleak. We need help fast. May the Almighty Allah come to our rescue.